I’ve never had the ‘Brady Bunch’ type of upbringing; nor have I been a Seaver, Huckstable, Keaton, or you name the family. I don’t remember any family traditions, my mother was religious, not a whacko (well maybe I thought she was). I do remember at certain times of the year we would have to do ceremonies.
One such ceremony I remember is Petar Pak (sp). It was usually around the beginning of the school year in September. The long and short of it was that the dead are ‘locked up’ and it is this time of year that we would go out in the morning and we would throw water (by hand) on a designated plant. While doing so we would call the names of the dead. We tell them to come and drink water, I believe this went on fora week and it would usually culminate in a ceremony at the house where A LOT of Indian food would be cooked, we’d go out and call them to drink and then there were plates of food left–which the neighbors cats would eat BUT aid you’re Hindu those are your relatives in their form coming to eat. right?
My mother has been gone 6 years now. I think about her everyday! When I’m driving I talk to her which is ironic since we never really talked when she was alive. I mean we talked but never anything deep. I feel like I have no traditions with her. When I talk to her I’m a little upset that she doesn’t talk back to me, a la ‘burning bush’ or some non-sense like that.
I heard her tell a story about when my father was killed in the 70’s, one day she heard his voice and he said ‘you better be careful,’ which as I’m writing this he never speaks to me also I am very literal, I can’t see something thru the trees and know it was them speaking I need them to say it plain and simply to me. I always get mad that she never really came back and said something to me.
As Mother’s Day comes and goes next Sunday I will miss her more yet again. I will miss giving her slippers and taking her to dinner. I know she is there somewhere looking over me–or I at least hope is.
I miss you so very much Ma…